SURRENDER THE NEED FOR ANSWERS


“I saw everything that happened to you…but I knew I would restore you.”

As a little girl, you craved the security of a dad who’s close. Who sees all your hurts and swoops in to fix them. If that wasn’t your story, know that your story’s not over. There is a father who saw it all. And if you give him the chance he’ll fix it too.


“You need to raise your own children.”

Not an audible voice, just sort of rose up in me.

I’d heard the whisper enough times before to know it wasn’t my mine. But these words weren’t welcome.

What do You mean raise my own children? As in stay home? But, but what about the career in medicine I worked so hard for and for so long?

The silence that followed was uncomfortable, to say the least. Some days later I heard the whisper again but with more urgency. Not a suggestion, but an invitation to surrender my Isaac—the long-awaited promise.

And when I took a deep breath, I saw the wisdom.

As a military family, who knew how often we’d move and for a physician, that wouldn’t be feasible. Plus, when we moved, who else but me would settle the family in, especially when my husband went underway.

But all that reasoning wasn’t enough to answer the biggest question. Why?

Why did you create me with such fierce perseverance? Why the “knowing” I’d be a pediatrician since age 6? Why the miracles along the way and the people You gave to encourage me, if You wanted me to walk away and raise my family?

It’s an answer I still don’t have 17 years later.

But what I have is a beautiful family who’s lived around the country, making amazing memories. I have the honor of being present for all my children’s firsts, being the one who introduced them to Jesus, and being the primary shaper of their character.

So, do I miss medicine? Aspects of it, for sure. Would I have had the impact on the masses I’ve had on my children and their future children? Definitely not.

Do I still ask God why? Sometimes, but I’ve surrendered my need for an answer. Will you?

I’m rooting for you!

[*Psalm 37:4, **Proverbs 19:21]

Wear the message

Some messages you have to wear on your body till it’s written on your heart. You are SEEN. KNOWN. LOVED. This soft tee of the month comes in 5 colors.

Are you a mom? Then we should talk…

Join me for Motherhood Unmasked

It’s the podcast for real talk about the challenges you face in motherhood, along with some compassion, candor, and clarity to see you through. Moms don’t let other moms do it alone! So, come on in—TUESDAYS.

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